Marrying more than one wife

MarryingMoreThanOneWifeMARRYING MORE THAN ONE WIFE_Ebooklet

DOES MARRIAGE INCREASE ONE’S RIZQ (SUSTENANCE)?

Question

A person complained to Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) that he is suffering from poverty. Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) advised him to get married.

Is this authentic?
Answer

Hafiz Khatib Al Baghdadi (rahimahullah) has recorded this incident in his Tarikh with a very weak chain.

(Tarikh Baghdad, vol. 2 pg. 233/234. Mizanul I’tidal, vol. 2 pg. 148 – 3116-)

However, there are numerous verses of The Holy Quran and Hadiths which prove that nikah does increase sustenance, among them are the following:

1) Allah Ta’ala Mentions:

“Get the unmarried ones among you married, as well as the righteous slave men and slave women. If they are poor, Allah will make them independent by his grace”

(Surah Nur, verse: 32)

Sayyiduna ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Abbas (radiyallahu ‘anhuma) under the commentary of this verse would say:

“Allah Ta’ala commanded and encouraged them to get married, and he promised them wealth”

Similar statements have also been reported from Sayyiduna Abu Bakr As Siddiq and Sayyiduna ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud (radiyallahu ‘anhuma)

(Refer: Tafsir Ibn Abi Hatim, Tafsir Ibn Kathir and Ad Durrul Manthur, Surah Nur, verse 32)

2) Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah (radiyallahu ‘anhu) reports that Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said:

“There are three types of people whom it is a right upon Allah to help and assist, The Mujahid in the path of Allah, The Mukatab [a slave paying for his freedom] who intends to pay and the one who makes nikah intending chastity”

(Sunan Tirmidhi, Hadith: 1655, Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith: 2518 – Declared sound (hasan) by Imam Tirmidhi and authentic (sahih) by Imam Ibn Hibban; Al Ihsan, Hadith: 4030)

3) Sayyiduna ‘Abdullah Ibn ‘Abbas (radiyallahu ‘anhuma) reports that (Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said:

“Seek for sustenance in nikah”

(Daylami with a weak chain. Refer: Al Maqasidul Hasanah, pg. 82, Hadith: 162)

4) Sayyiduna ‘Umar Ibn Al Khattab (radiyallahu ‘anhu) would say:

“I am surprised at the person who does not search for wealth by means of marriage, whereas Allah Ta’ala has stated “If they are poor, Allah will make them independent by his grace”

(‘Abdur Razzaq, Refer: Al Maqasidul Hasanah, pg. 83, Hadith: 162)

5) Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said:

“Marry women, for verily they will bring wealth” [through the blessing of nikah]

(Musannaf Ibn Abi Shaybah, Hadith: 16161, mursalan- مرسلا- , with a reliable chain)

And Allah Ta’ala Knows best.

Answered by: Moulana Suhail Motala

Approved by: Moulana Muhammad Abasoomar

Checked by: Moulana Haroon Abasoomar

The Garment of Marriage​

From a kurta to an abaaya, and a pair of pants to a shirt – almost all items of clothing are made in the same way – by joining different pieces of fabric together.

The process, in essence, is as follows:

First, different pieces of cloth are gathered. Then, they are trimmed and cut to size and shape. Finally, they are all joined together with thread and further strengthened through a process commonly known as ‘over locking’.

Now, believe it or not, marriage is exactly the same as sewing a garment. Two different people come together for the purpose of nikaah. In order to ‘fit’ one another and form a prosperous marriage, both have to ‘trim’ and ‘reshape’ themselves, by making adjustments to their ways, and certain sacrifices, for the sake of their partner, as far as their preferences, likes and dislikes are concerned. Finally, they are connected and joined by the thread of love.

However, just like with any garment that is worn on a regular basis, a marriage will also be subjected to certain periods of stress which will place a strain on the seams holding the marriage together. It is in these periods that the significance of the over locking becomes apparent. If the over locking was done well, the seams will not tear apart and begin to fray. On the contrary, if the over locking is found lacking in any regard, it will split and leave the garment in tatters.

In a marriage though, it is no over locking that keeps the seams together – it is OVERLOOKING. If the husband and wife are not prepared to forgive and overlook each other’s mistakes, the strain may become too great for even the thread of love to bear, resulting in a torn, tattered and frayed marriage.

Once a garment is torn, it cannot always be patched and repaired, as sometimes, the damage is so great that the entire marriage lies in shreds. Even in the case where it can be repaired, it often leaves the garment marred and unsightly, with its former beauty forever lost.

When the seas get stormy and the ship is unsteady, many people opt to abandon ship. However, on jumping overboard, most of them fail to land in a lifeboat and are left to drown. Hence, once you are out at sea, even an unsteady ship is better than no ship at all! When jumping off the ship is not an option, then we will have to make the best of the ship that we have – and this will only be possible if we have the heart to overlook.

Remember, if we overlook the mistakes of others, perhaps Allah Ta‘ala will overlook our many mistakes on the Day of Qiyaamah.

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GET MARRIED IN SAFAR

With the month of Safar upon us, Ulama are exhorting the Muslim public to let go of superstitious baggage regarding this month that they say has its roots in the Days of Ignorance.
In years gone by, Cii Radio has witnessed that there are still comparatively fewer Nikahs being performed in the months of Muharram and Safar, and it is often speculated that this is the case due to a perception that still sees these months being characterized as periods of mourning, grief and ill omen.

In the days of Jahiliyyah (prior to the appointment of the Prophet SAW as the Messenger of Allah), the pagans used to believe that the month of Safar would bring evil omens; but the matter was sufficiently clarified by the Messenger of Allah who made it absolutely clear that no day, no week, no month, and no year brings along with it evil omens.

In a Hadith narrated by Al Bukhari, Nabi SAW said, : (There is) no ‘Adwa (no contagious disease is conveyed without Allah’s permission), nor is there any bad omen (from birds), nor is there any Hamah, nor is there any bad omen in the month of Safar, and one should run away from the leper as one runs away from a lion.”

Commenting on such superstitions that some still harbour regarding Safar, senior Ladysmith based Aalim Moulana Salim Kareem says the main panacea is to acquire full trust that all conditions – good or bad – come from Allah SWT.

Belief in Taqdeer(Predestination) is essential to our faith. Once the Messenger of Allah SWT asked the Sahaba RA if they are true Muslims. They replied in the affirmative. The Messenger of Allah SWT then probed them further asking how could they prove such a contention. They replied citing three qualities: Their gratefulness for Allah SWT’s bounties upon them; their patience on calamities than befell them; and their belief in Taqdeer.

The Sahaba RA questioned Nabi SAW on many things(on behalf of the entire Ummah) during his lifetime. One of them was the superstition that clouded the month of Safar. Answering them, Nabi SAW clearly negated the superstition that Safar was a month of bad omens.

The sad thing is that, in spite of this lots of people still believe that the first 13 days of this month are particularly calamitous, especially for menfolk. And lots of people would shut their homes on the 13th of Safar and proceed elsewhere believing that some form of evil is about to descend.

These are very dangerous beliefs that come very close to Kufr and Shirk.

Allah SWT teaches us in the Quraan, Surah Hadid Verse 23:

“No disaster strikes upon the earth or among yourselves except that it is in a register before We bring it into being – indeed that, for Allah , is easy”

So if any evil actually touches us, we learn from this Ayah that it may actually be coming to us due to our own sinful actions.

To combat superstitions, evil thoughts and ward off potential calamities from our lives try to read the following Dua mentioned in the Hadeeth of Sayyidina Rasulullah SAW often:

“بِسْمِ اللهِ الَّذِي لَا يَضُرُّ مَعَ اسْمِهِ شَيْءٌ فِي الْأَرْضِ وَلَا فِي السَّمَاءِ وَهُوَ السَّمِيعُ الْعَلِيمُ”.

Bismillaahil-lathee laa yadhurru ma’as-mihi shay’un fil-’ardhi wa laa fis-samaa’i wa Huwas-Samee ‘ul- ‘Aleem .

In the Name of Allah, Who with His Name nothing can cause harm in the earth nor in the heavens, and He is the All-Hearing, the All-Knowing. (Recite three times in Arabic).

Reference:
“Whoever recites it three times in the morning will not be afflicted by any calamity before evening, and whoever recites it three times in the evening will not be overtaken by any calamity before morning.” Abu Dawud 4/323, At-Tirmithi 5/465, Ibn Majah 2/332, Ahmad. Ibn Majah’s chain of transmission is good (Hasan).

This Dua with full faith can serve as a shield from all calamities and evil, not only in Safar, but on every day and night of our lives.

Always maintain good thoughts of Allah SWT, and Allah SWT will treat you accordingly.

So to be clear, there is absolutely no sin getting married in the months of Muharram and Safar and there is nothing to be perturbed about regarding the specific day of the 13th Safar.

So whoever intends getting married in this period, don’t even for a moment think it is a month of bad luck or a month unsuitable for marriage or travel etc.

cii radio

marry w/o parents consent

Q. I am 19 years old and am in a relationship with a girl for the past two years. My partner and I are ready to get married. As she and I are still studying, we cannot live together. Her mother is aware of the relationship, but due to culture they are not willing for us to get married. They want us to wait until her turn comes. She has two elder sisters who are not married. Are we allowed to have our Nikah performed without the permission of her parents? She is also 19.
A. In the circumstances it is permissible to get married without the consent of the parents. The parents have forfeited their wilaayat by placing their daughter in a zina situation. It is not permissible for them to have sent their daughter to study at an institution which specializes in sin and haraam. The parents are immoral and anti-Islam. They have great concern for their culture, but are totally unmindful of Jahannam’s pathway they have paved for their daughter. They are able to tolerate zina, but not Nikah for the sake of their stupid custom and culture.

Q & A

Q. If a boy is interested in a girl for marriage and comes to meet the girl’s family, what questions should they ask him? What qualities should the girl’s parents look for in the boy?
A. The relatives of the girl should not ask the boy any questions at the viewing sessions. They should make discreet enquiries about the boy’s character from others before allowing him to view their daughter. Only if they are satisfied with his moral character should they allow the viewing to take place.
The qualities to look for are good morality, correct Aqaaid (beliefs) and intelligence. It should also be ascertained if the boy is a chap of responsibility. He should not be like an irresponsible tablighi who will abandon his wife without adequate means and arrangement, and go for a few months or a year on a tablighi stint. The purpose of viewing is only to ascertain if the couple is attracted to each other. It is not for ascertaining character, for this is impossible from a couple of moments of viewing.

GETTING MARRIED AFTER UNIVERSITY

Q: Today many Asian parents in the west are only willing to get their children married after university education and finding a job by which time they are 25 or 26 years of age or older. The argument is that they need to be settled financially before marriage. In the interim however, it is difficult to envisage that in the environment we live in that these children manage to control their gaze, curb their desires and stay away from some of relationship with the opposite sex? A few teenage children have summoned the courage in our community to tell their parents that they need to get married but the parents argue that they need to finish their studies, get a good job and only then they will financially be able to support a wife. It is difficult to understand how a father who was once young and felt the urge to satisfy his desires now no longer understands or refuses to accede to the requests of his teenage son to get married.

1. What is the Shar’i ruling in such a situation?

2. Is it correct for parents to refuse marriage of their child until studies are finished, particularly in western countries where there is a distinctive threat of involvement in some form of zina?

3. Can the a teenage boy, who fears falling in to sin, yet his parents flatly refuse/delay him get him married, find his own wife and have his nikah conducted with witnesses?

Bismillaah

A: When there is a need to make nikaah then nikaah becomes fardh, and when it becomes fardh then the fardh has to be done. It is not subject to the approval of the parents. Go forth and do it on your own if they are not concerned. If not, you will be sinful.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.

Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)